This page is for posts I make and end up disagreeing with. Not because people don’t like them but because I don’t like them after a while. Some of them may be impulsive/forced, and others just plain wrong. But they are necessary to show some sort of evolution of opinion even if it’s over a day.
This is something I believe everyone has to deal with at some point in their lives. I guess the real question is how does it make you feel? Unhappy? Unwanted? Detached? These are common reactions that people have. But what is the normal reaction? I don’t think there is one.
I remember my first real experience of being alone. It was in a chess game, my friend and I did a lot of things together, played countless games, studied books, and everything young chess players do to improve their game. We improved to the point that we felt we were good enough to challenge a regional champion. After my friend played and lost, I felt it was my job to avenge him, after all his game reflected my own, almost every move he made was a product of our previous matches and our hours of study together. The game started, and got serious really quickly. In a matter of minutes I was outplayed, positionally, and mentally. I looked up to my friend, almost to say how did we get into this? He turned away. His message was clear, this is your game not ours. I was left shocked and alone in this place that I have since referred to as the black and white jungle.
People will react to this differently, I ended up winning the game with a questionable sacrifice that stunned my opponent into time pressure. And I realised I something about myself. I enjoy being alone, with my thoughts that I treasure so much, with my freedom,with my beliefs, and with my self.
Of course due to the requirements of the society we live in, I must interact and forge relationships, some of them I enjoy, some of them are very beneficial, and sometimes I actually long for these interactions. But not once have I felt unhappy at the thought of being alone since.
In no way am I saying this is the right approach to life, but I know it certainly doesn’t feel like the wrong one. That’s why I feel like anyone who brands people as loners is innately insecure maybe even defines himself by how others see him. I refuse to condemn any lifestyle I don’t understand. Social culture is often allowed to dictate what people believe is right or wrong, what ‘god’ people believe in and so on. There is absolutely no shame in being a minority. Because at the end of the day we’re all alone.